Divorce proceedings aren’t easy. These high-stress and contentious procedures can often have a negative impact on the mental state of the parties involved. It is not uncommon for spouses to feel unloved, hurt, angry, stressed, disappointed and resentful. People going through divorces often seek support from those around them and in doing so end up badmouthing their soon-to-be ex-partner.
Why spouses badmouth their former partners
Spouses often badmouth their former spouses in an attempt to gain sympathy and support from those around them. They may feel unloved and angry and may badmouth their spouse in order to get people on their side.
Another common reason why couples badmouth their spouses is because they want to get revenge against their ex. This is often the case when spouses are angry and hurt. They are yet to accept the situation and end up badmouthing their spouses to make allies out of their children, family and friends in the hope of hurting their ex.
Reasons not to badmouth your spouse
It can be tempting to speak ill of your spouse. It can feel good getting revenge on your spouse momentarily. However, there are serious repercussions of badmouthing your spouse.
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It will harm your children
Children are often caught in-between when it comes to divorce wars. These innocents end up suffering the most in bitter divorce battles where parents try to use them as weapons to make their ex-spouse suffer. These children are influenced to believe that one parent is all ‘bad’ and the other is all ‘good.’
While you may feel triumphant that your children are now your allies, your negative statements will rob them of the opportunity to maintain a healthy relationship with both their parents. You will not only be destroying their chance of growing up with the love and support of both their parents but also building up walls between you and your children as they will be afraid of expressing their true feelings to you.
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You may lose your opportunity to get custody of your children
You may be badmouthing your spouse with the aim of alienating the children from them but end up losing your rights to custody instead. Tennessee law prohibits making disparaging remarks about your ex-spouse in the hearing of or directly to your spouse’s children or their employer. When you file for a divorce in Tennessee, the court issues an automatic temporary injunction. This is done to prevent unnecessary conflict between you and your spouse. It is also done to prevent both you and your spouse from engaging in unethical behavior such as badmouthing each other.
Badmouthing your spouse, even if the statements are true, will mean you will have violated the injunction. You could be held in contempt of court, which can result in you losing custody or jeopardizing other aspects of your case.
A divorce is a stressful and emotional process. However, you can’t afford to let your emotions dictate your actions or your words. Speak with your divorce attorney to find out more about what you should avoid during divorce proceedings.